Thursday, April 14

I LOVE it when I get like this! (But it will probably be real annoying to you.)

Perhaps you know these lyrics by India.Arie (please feel free to sing along):

Sometimes I shave my legs and sometimes I don't
Sometimes I comb my hair and sometimes I won't
Depend on how the wind blows I might even paint my toes
It really just depends on whatever feels good in my soul.

CHORUS:
I'm not the average girl from your video
and I ain't built like a supermodel
But, I learned to love myself unconditionally
Because I am a queen
I'm not the average girl from your video
My worth is not determined by the price of my clothes
No matter what I'm wearing I will always be India Arie. (in my case, Stacey Leigh!)

When I look in the mirror and the only one there is me
Every freckle on my face is where it's supposed to be
And I know my creator didn't make no mistakes on me
My feet, my thighs, my lips, my eyes; I'm lovin' what I see.

CHORUS

Am I less of a lady if I don't wear pantyhose?
My mama said a lady ain't what she wears but, what she knows
But, I've drawn a conclusion, it's all an illusion, confusion's the name of the game
A misconception, a vast deception
Something's gotta change
Don't be offended this is all my opinion
ain't nothing that I'm sayin’ law.
This is a true confession of a life learned lesson I was sent here to share wit y'all
So get in where you fit in go on and shine
Clear your mind, now's the time
Put your salt on the shelf
Go on and love yourself
'Cuz everything's gonna be all right.

Keep your fancy drinks and your expensive minks
I don't need that to have a good time
Keep your expensive car and your caviar
All I need is my guitar
Keep your Kristal and your pistol
I'd rather have a pretty piece of crystal
Don't need your silicone I prefer my own
What God gave me is just fine.

CHORUS

GRRRRROWL!!!!!!!!

I LOVE WHEN I BELIEVE THIS! Yup, inside my heart I still have a little bit of that 14 year old girl who has no idea whatsoever that she’s darling and brilliant, but thankfully, that girl is looking around from the inside today and she’s pretty happy with her grown-up self.

My grown-up self is certainly different than what I ever thought I’d be. For example, I never, ever, thought I’d be divorced once, let alone twice. I never thought I’d do anything remotely technical for a job – I thought I wanted to be a newspaper writer. Never thought I’d still have NO IDEA what I want to be when I grow up! Never thought I’d live several states away from my parents, either. Never thought my best friend would be the one who has a bunch of fabulous kids, and I’d still have none of those at 35.

Never thought a lot of things.

Never thought I’d have this great a group of friends. But, thank God, I do. You know I could go on forever and ever about how much I love Beth (VBF), Matt, The Numbers, and all the stunningly great people I adore who allow me backstage access in their lives. I’m so beyond blessed in this area.

Never thought I’d like my parents as much as I do. They are truly great people, and hardly dysfunctional at all. Hehe.

Never thought I’d look in the mirror and see funny, pretty, and sparkling. Being 14 was so difficult that I thought I’d see “fat” forever. There’s no mistaking I still am fat; it’s just not what I’m puttin’ out to the world. If you’ve ever met me, you know that I’m putting out the fun, the sparkly, the overboard, the wheeeeee, the smart, the expressive, the damn pretty, and the sexy. Oh, and the terribly modest, obviously.

Never thought I’d be so comfortable with knowing so little. Never thought I’d feel so loved by God. Never thought telling God, “I’m wicked,” would result in the total acceptance I get from God. Never thought I’d be so comforted by honesty.

If you haven’t tried on this feeling, I encourage you to do it immediately! It feels AWESOME! When you believe you’re totally loved and really lovable, it makes being happy for other people so easy! (It’s at this point you’re asking yourself where I get my meth, but I assure you, I’m totally straight.) I’m thrilled for my VBF and the incredible children that she and her husband have. Thrilled. I’m thrilled that Christel has the Husband who is so freekin’ cute it makes me a little giddy. I’m over the moon that Matt has a great life and someone to be close to. I’m so happy for Judd I could almost cry. (But I didn’t.) I’m so happy for Dr. Mary that she’s getting her dream house and it’s so incredibly beautiful! I’m excited for The Fig because he’s going to go follow his dream – and he actually knows what that is. I’m excited for Allie that she can have puppydoodles(es) in her house! How totally cool.

And I absolutely believe I’ll have the day-to-day meaning and the spectacular love that my soul wants so much.

What a great day.

This entry is obviously for me alone. But, enjoy the happy and the silly, anyway. Then call me and ask me where I got my meth.

7 comments:

Allie said...

adore. that's all i can say. i adore you. and i hope you know that each and every day.

Miss Demon Seed said...

I feel the love for you every day. It doesn't matter if I haven't talked to you in months I still feel the love for you and this is one of the reasons why.

Tasty said...

Did I mention that I love the snot out of you all? 'Cause I do.

Amy S. Petrik said...

i love and adore india arie.

christelpistol said...

and THAT is why we cant live close to each other.

we would just spiral out of control and burst into a million tiny numbered pieces.


i am SOOOOO lovin you, Face.

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