Momentary Goat Rodeo

Oh, how entertaining life can be. Just a day or two ago I was telling you that I had acquired a new title that you should feel free to use. Lo, and behold, (don't you love that phrase?) I've already run into a snag or eleven. Thankfully I did have a bit of foresight, and included this in my previous essay, "My feelings on the suitability of that being MY title are subject to change without notice -- likely around the time PMS kicks in." I got news: PMS didn't even need to kick in!

So, I'm bobbing happily along in my really, really nice life, complete with awesome friends, a delightful family, niece and nephews who love me, a DARling apartment, and even a supercool, creative man-person I care a ton about. When, BLAM! Out of nowhere, the Goat Rodeo ensues. It's always the stuff you don't expect. My veryownpersonal Goat Rodeo consisted of attending a baby shower, which was simply lovely but where the mom-to-be is not really prepared for parenthood (not that I am, entirely, either, but hang with me.) The baby is a girl, and there are no less than 6,012 cute girl dresses and blankets and shoes and things all laid out after the gifts are opened. And then there are the seven babies there running around being really cute -- none of them are screeching, making them even more appealing to the casual observer. Then, there are the three 20 year old girls who are newly married and pregnant. (Oh, and there was a killer chicken casserole for lunch.)

Normally, this is all very charming and sweet and motherly. But when you're about to turn 36 (yes, I know I'm harping!) and you've managed to get to that age without ever having been pregnant, or knowing if you ever will be, or in my schizophrenic case, if you actually want to be, these things are less charming. Instead, these things serve only to remind you that you aren't married (and never have been happily) and that you don't have any kids, and you're not sure you ever will, and and and and and! And I managed to waste most of a gorgeous Sunday being all weepy and sad and mourning the loss of whatever future I made up for myself when I was 20. I'd have been LIVING a Goat Rodeo if I'd have gotten what I wished for back then.

DUH! Today is a new day, and all I can tell you is: Thank God I'm not 20 anymore. I know one or two more things than I did 16 years ago. And I don't spend EVERY gorgeous Sunday crying about things I can't change. I'm not saying I'm done thinking about kids forever, I'm simply saying that it was nice not to have to dress anyone but myself or drop anyone off at school this morning. I've literally never been happier as an adult. Really. Life in my DAR apartment is really cool. With intermittent Goat Rodeo festivities.

Happy Monday!